embracing life and letting God

8.16.2010

Building a Strong Marriage

 

Courtney at Women Living Well is having a wonderful end of summer challenge for those interested in "Assessing Your Marriage".  In addition she is having a give-away as she inspires women to take a deeper look into this 'Season' of their marriages. 

This is how I Build A Strong Marriage...
I must continue to remember those dating days and
what made me fall in love with my husbands in the first place.

It's almost unheard of  these days in the world we live in, but when I met my husband 23 years ago it was truly Love at First Sight.  He walked into the room and the Lord spoke to my heart, "You will marry that man, he will be your husband."   We had so much fun while dating.  He made me laugh all the time.  His ability to quote movie lines, create songs from whatever situation we found ourselves in and look at me adoringly when I had no make-up was amazing.  To this day, he continues to make me laugh.  Being married and having three children only adds to the 'situations' that feed his ability to laugh about life.



I Must Remember my sacred vows
To love, honor, cherish, and obey.  For Richer or poorer, sickness and in health, in good times and in bad.  I made those promises before my God and my husband.  As hard as that is some days the reward greatly out-weighs the destruction that can come when I want my own way.  I am an only child, so I tend to be more selfish than those who had to daily share with a brother or sister.  The Lord gave me this wonderful husband because he is the only one in this world that can love me unconditionally inspite of my flaws.  I promised to stick with him through thick and thin and that is what I intend to do until the day I die.

I Must Remember to ask my husband how I can be praying for him daily

How can I not?  My husband faces daily challenges with his job alone, stresses that I know God equipped him to maneuver.  Though he was created to be in this job, in this season, he needs daily encouragement. He needs my prayers to edify him and show him how much I care for him and his journey through faith in an evil world.

Remember to tell my husband how I admire him
Admiring him doesn't mean just looking adoringly or having favorable thoughts toward my husband.

ad·mir·ing [ əd mring ]


showing admiration: full of admiration for somebody or something

It means that I, in every look, action, word and thought try to show appreciation to my husband for all that he does to make our lives so blessed; show approval of the efforts he puts forth with work, our home, our marriage and our family; I am complimentary  flattering, favorable, deferential, positive, sympathetic, pleased him.  I tell him often how thankful I am that he works so hard for us, so that we can stay at home.  I don't deserve it and yet I am blessed with it.


I Must Remember to keep my priorities in line

Many days I run, run, run homeschooling 3 children, tending to their activities as well as keeping up with the duties I need to stay on top of around the home, I just want to crash in the evenings [read dive into my bed and hide under the covers].  But a real relationship takes spending time with one another, listening, talking, watching shows together, intimacy.  If I don't make my husband a priority over all of the stuff I want for myself how are we going to grow closer.  My time with him is the foundation of our marriage.  All of the other benefits I enjoy are just icing on the cake from having
6.Remember to follow your husband's lead and vision for your family.

Remember to respect your husband
Respecting my husband means that I have chosen to go through this life with him not living in constant offense or with a perfectionist attitude.  I have chosen to remember that he is flawed as I am flawed.  Therefore, neither of us being perfect, I speak to him, look at him and treat him with respect whether he deserves it or not.  When I sense that he would like something done because it is causing him stress then why not bless him and do it for him?  How many days have I been overwhelmed with caring for little ones and he just took control and said "let me to that for you honey"? 

I Must Remember to keep kissing him like you mean it!
Oooo!  I like this one a lot.  I never like forgetting this one. Kissing my love like I mean it just seems to bring wholeness to us both.  When my children 'catch us'  kissing, though they are "yuck" and "gross" in the background they see what true love really is.  They see that at the end of the day daddy and mommy really do love each other and they feel safe and secure in the world, if only for a moment.



We are a little older now and hopefully a little wiser.  We have grown so much together starting as teenagers in love, him 18, me 16.  We have experienced a love only God can give.  We have served one another the best we both knew how.  We have suffered loss together that no human should have to experience and yet we drew closer to one another.  We have created life together in three of the greatest gifts God has ever and will ever give us in this lifetime.  It is ALL worth it!  Because at the end of every day I have him to love me and I to love him.

No matter what season you are in, God longs for you to follow his design for marriage.

From my heart to yours,

1 comment:

  1. Sweet Mindy,
    Thank you for posting this. I need to remember these as well. My DH is losing his jobs and he blew me away tonight while explaining to our oldest about it. He told him he had to "find a good job quickly because Mom has to do homeschool." He is very reserved so sometimes I am not sure how he feels about hs'ing but this was so awesome to hear.

    ReplyDelete

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